literature

DHvV: The Battle of Prince John's castle part 2

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It was past midnight at Prince John’s castle, and none of the guards were fully awake. Even the card guards brought in from Wonderland couldn’t motivate themselves to do their rounds with any real vigor. Prince John had thought he was so clever to ‘buff up’ security in light of Aladdin’s upcoming execution tomorrow morning…and then make sure that every guard had the same round no matter what time it was. His logic had apparently been that there would be no risk of break-ins during guard transfers, which seemed sound in theory. In practice, however…

A card guard, designated ‘3’, was watching the west wall, opposite the building housing the dungeon. His job was to stare at the west wall for a white horse, and sound an alarm if there was a white horse. That was it. Every second there wasn’t a white horse going over the wall, he wasn’t allowed to move. There hadn’t been a white horse going over the wall for 5 hours straight. He had been staring at the wall for 5 hours. There had been no white horse.

Once, he saw a black shape in the night sky for a second. It hadn’t been a white horse. Probably just a bird. It wasn’t a horse, so it didn’t matter. He didn’t care anymore. The only way he could care was if there was a white horse over the walls. Then he could do something with his life. His life as a card guard. Why was he a card guard? Who cared. Being a guard was boring, and being a card didn’t make much difference. Why would it? What was the point of –

WHUMP.

The guard’s self-pitying train of thought was derailed by a blow to the back of his head. The fox who dealt the blow breathed a sigh of relief. That had been easier than he’d thought…For every decent pre-emptive measure Prince John took, there was always a stupid notion that a good thief could exploit. And Robin Hood was one of the best thieves in the land.

With the sentry knocked out, Robin was free to grab his keys and look for his two assistants. Tigger and Pooh had the sense to slip into a dark corner once they’d finished their jobs – transportation and cushion, respectively. He gave them a thumbs-up signal before throwing them the keys. Tigger was quick to leap to the door on the west castle wall and unlock it.

It had been an undeniably odd idea that Jasmine had, but it was their only viable option at the moment. Tigger had bounced over the wall twice – once to place Pooh in position, and the second to bring Robin Hood over the wall. Pooh had to act as a cushion for Robin Hood – the fox wasn’t built to handle a ‘bounce’ from the height needed to clear the wall, and Prince John wasn’t known to keep carts of hay or pillows in the castle grounds. Robin counted his lucky stars that Tigger was so accurate with his bounce – he’d never guessed that he was so skilled at what he did.

The second the door was open, Squad B (as it had come to be called) slipped into the castle grounds. Clopin, Yao, Ling, Chien Po, Mickey and Piglet came inside and ran to the dungeon building, being careful to avoid the other guards on the walltops…

“Shouldn’t there be more guards?” Mickey whispered to Robin Hood when he had a chance.

“It’s almost dawn…I’ll wager Prince John has moved them to the main courtyard for the execution.” Robin Hood suggested as he continued to work the door’s lock.

“Heheh…they’re in for a rude surprise when they find Hercules still got his strength.” Ling chuckled quietly.

“Oh my! Are we all going to shout ‘Surprise’?” Pooh asked eagerly.

Yao groaned, slapping a hand to his face. “Shuddup, bear.”

Clopin mulled to himself. “Something’s definitely off…I can feel it.”

“It doesn’t matter. We have to hurry.” Robin Hood reminded them, just as he finished clicking the lock open. “We’re in!”

The rescue squad swiftly darted inside the dungeon building, not realizing that they were being watched…

---------------

The King felt useless.

He hadn’t been born into royalty, like so many of the foppish nobles he had to deal with. Once upon a time, he was a simple knight’s squire, much like Sir Ector’s adopted son. But when circumstances bade him to take up the mantle of his fallen master, he did so without hesitation. Soon, he was the strongest knight in all the land, slaying ogres, trolls and rogue giants wherever they had appeared.

His greatest feat, the one he took the most pride in, was the defeat of the dragon queen, Maleficent. He had been the one to slay her, with the aid of the three fairies Flora, Fauna and Merryweather, so many years ago…if only she had stayed slain.

Regardless, that was the feat that earned him the love of his life, and the end of his time as a knight. Once he was crowned King, he dedicated his life to his kingdom…and once his son was born, he dedicated himself to being the best father he could possibly be.

Over time, the strength and skill he had gained as a knight fell away – days of signing treaties, attending royal feasts and bouncing on the bed with his son did little to keep himself in shape. He didn’t mind at the time – there had been no war, merely the raising of his son and maintaining the kingdom. This was his due reward, the best he could hope for after his life of combat. A comfortable retirement, lasting long enough to see his son marry the woman he loved and bear grandchildren before passing on to his eternal reward.

All that had changed when Maleficent had returned. Her allies, Pete and the Queen of Hearts, had attacked their castle and overtook them swiftly. Sir Ector and Sir Kay had fought valiantly, but they had been overwhelmed. The King attempted to assist…but he quickly fell, no longer the knight he had once been.

How the dragon queen lived again was easy enough to understand…she had made a pact with the god of death, Hades. Why she chose to rally her allies and attack now, after so many years, was less clear. On an educated guess, it had something to do with the upcoming celestial formation his scholars had spoken of. What truly puzzled the king, however, was why she would not deal with her killer personally.

Perhaps she had not recognized the fat, middle-aged king who was easily taken prisoner as the gallant knight who slew her so long ago. Or worse, she HAD recognized him, and decided not to give him the dignity of facing his archenemy, shoving him off to one of her lesser allies to languish in a cell, helpless to do anything.

He did not think ill of his cellmates, but there was no doubt an insult to be confined with an innkeeper, two mad party animals and one that was slightly less mad. The hatter had bemoaned the end of his party and the loss of his hat, which had no doubt been locked up along with Sir Kay’s sword. The young thief, Aladdin, had briefly given him a glimmer of hope, but he had been taken to be executed, and now all he could do was sit and wait and pray and…

A ruckus outside his cell woke him from his thoughts. He wondered if his guards, the Beagle brothers, had simply gotten into yet another argument, but there were voices he didn’t recognize, shouting…

Sarah Hawkins, the innkeeper, was already watching through the bars, and she turned to him with a surprisingly excited and eager expression. “Hey…hey, come here!” she whispered loud enough for him to hear.

The King slowly got up to his feet and walked up to the cell bars. He wasn’t sure what it was he expected to see, but it certainly wasn’t the scene before him.

The three cell guards were in combat with four strange individuals. Three men – one skinny, one large, and one short – and a mouse Mobian (that was what they were called to differentiate them from regular animals, talking or otherwise). Despite the fact that the Beagle Boys were armed with swords and their opponents were carrying sticks and a fencing rapier, the guards were being outfought quite easily. The short man and mouse ducked under each swing, hitting their opponents in the shins whenever they had a shot. The thin one weaved around his enemy like a snake, eventually smashing his stave against the back of his head. The large one didn’t need to dodge anything – he just grabbed the sword blade with his bare hands and flung the guard into the wall.

The King felt a smile on his face. They were being rescued! Aladdin had been right about his friends coming for him…but were they in time to save the lad?

One of the guards backed up against the cell bars, and Sarah Hawkins wasted no time. Reaching her arms through the bars, she wrapped the guard in a chokehold, holding him in place for a strong punch to the face. The short man jumped up and delivered that punch eagerly. The guard slumped to the floor like a ragdoll.

“Thanks, miss!”

“Don’t mention it.” Hawkins reassured him. “Can you get us out?”

“Of course.” The mouse fished the cell keys off one of the unconscious guards and turned it in the doorknob. The door opened, and Sarah wasted no time in stepping out and giving the mouse a hug that left him gasping for breath.

The King tried to be more dignified, and bowed graciously to the three men. “I am in your debt. Thank you.”

“Think nothing of it.” The large man reassured with a gentle voice.

The other doors were soon opened, and the King was reunited with his friends, the Grand Duke, Sir Ector and Sir Kay. The Hatter, Hare and Toad were freed as well, to varying degrees of joy.

“HOORAY!” Mr. Toad sang and danced with joy. “Free at last, I’m free! Are Moley and Ratty with you?”

“They’re back at the camp.” Chien Po reassured him.

The March Hare was just as exuberant. “This calls for a celebration! A tea party! All we need is the tea and table and cups!”

“And honey.” Pooh added.

“And my hat…” The Hatter moaned, still despondent.

“It’ll be with everything they took from us.” The Grand Duke deduced. “They said something about a confiscated goods room…”

A Mobian Fox that the King recognized as Robin Hood came running up from down the hall. “I’ve found where their trophy room is. It’s down the hall to the left. We’ll grab everything they took, and then we’ll get out of – “

“W-W-W-W-W-WOOOOOOOZLES!” A small creature that looked like a stuffed toy suddenly came running down the halls.

“…you mean weasels, Piglet.” Ling corrected.

“Yes, Woozles! A t-t-ton of them! They started pouring out of the other b-building and they’re coming here r-right now!” Piglet frantically pointed down several hallways at once.

The March Hare turned his ears and shivered. “They’re coming this way, it sounds like an army!”

Clopin froze. “An ambush?!”

“Get me to my sword!” Sir Ector shouted. “I will fight these villains alongside you all!”

Robin Hood didn’t waste time debating. “Everybody, this way!” he shouted, and the entire party ran after him.

Just as they were coming to a intersection, they saw a section of the weasel army charging towards them. There were at least a dozen of them they could see, and no doubt more behind them and in the other hallways. They couldn’t fight them all off, not now. The minute they saw the intruders, they armed their bows and readied their daggers.

Clopin glanced down the hallway to the right. There was another score of weasels charging at them full speed, armed with pikes and spears. The gypsy king got an idea, and he silently motioned to Robin Hood.

“Listen.” Robin Hood whispered. “When I shout ‘Now’, run into the door.”

“KILL THEM!” the head weasel shouted, and several bows and daggers started flying through the air at the escaped prisoners.

“NOW!”

In a second, two things happened. Clopin threw one of his smoke bombs at the ground underneath their feet, and they all turned and ran through the door Robin had pointed to. The second section of weasels charged through the smoke cloud, crashing into the first section head-on.

Chien Po and Mickey slammed the door shut, and Clopin quickly barricaded it with a convenient chair. Robin Hood pointed to a chest in the middle of the room. “Everything’s in there. Grab what you can and get ready…we might have to fight our way out.”

The King, Kay and Ector took their swords from the chest, and the March Hare took his hammer. Sarah removed a pistol she had tried to use against Hook, but was taken from her before she could fire a shot. The Hatter, meanwhile, rejoiced at being reunited with his hat, proudly setting it atop his head.

Clopin rolled his eyes and turned to the remaining fighters. “Is everybody alright?”

“Oh yeah, not a scratch!” Yao chuckled. “Those nitwits couldn’t hit the broad side of a …bear?!”

The three spun around to see that Pooh, Piglet and Tigger’s bodies had been filled with several arrows and daggers. Clearly, they had been blocking the initial salvo with their bodies so that the others wouldn’t be hurt. The shock of this development was somewhat diminished by the fact that they seemed to regard the weapons piercing their cloth skin as though they were burrs stuck to their clothing.

“Oh, bother.” Pooh sighed as he examined the arrows sticking out of his back.

Ling’s eyes went completely wide. “Wha…how…you…”

“Relax, kiddo. Hoo hoo hoo.” Tigger assured him, removing an arrowhead from his chest as if he was popping a zit. “We’re filled with fluff! These thingies don’t bother us none.”

“But we knew that th-th-they could hurt you.” Piglet explained, contemplating whether removing the dagger from his hand would be worth the rip being opened up. “And we couldn’t have that.”

“So you just…took every one?!” Yao suddenly had a new respect for the rather dim bear and his friends.

“For all the good it’ll do.” Pooh sighed, surprisingly depressed. “We got you out of one cell and into another.”

The bear’s statement was punctuated by the sound of the weasels banging at the door. It was true…right now, they were pinned in this room with an army waiting for them outside. Despite the new armaments Kay, Ector, the King and Sarah were wielding, it wasn’t likely they would last long.

“But still…” The Hatter strode up to Pooh with big smile on his face and a sudden Scottish Accent. “Ye’ve broken into a mighty stronghold, saved us from a terrible fate, protected us from death, and brought us our salvation.” He then yanked something out from the folds of his hat.

“Have a cookie!”
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